how to make DATING APPS work for you
Now that you know that online dating is a business, the paradox of choice, and the pitfalls of the shoppers’ mindset how can you make online dating work for you?
You are the one using the app, don’t let it use you. Turn off push notifications take breaks from the app as needed, in order to not get overwhelmed.
If you are not attracting enough prospective partners how can you make your profile more appealing? Do you need to get better pictures, update your profile, or be more open?
people are more forgiving in person
Stop with the hundred questions on email, text, or phone. Push to meet someone in person, the only way to assess chemistry is in person.
Many couples in long-term relationships will tell you that if they had met their partner online they may not have been an obvious fit. In real life, people are more forgiving especially when there is a mutual connection.
When it comes to finding a partner see the site online be prepared for doing some sifting. It may take you a while to sort through people, go on dates, and get to know people on a deeper level to assess real potential.
Try not to take things too personally but be able to be objective and make changes as necessary. If things are not going well can you figure out what changes you need to make? Is it timing, or do you need to look deeper into your own attachment style?
Clients will ask me how long they have to date, the answer will vary. You have to keep at it until you are successful. A consumer reports article called, ‘Match me if you can.’ looking at which dating sites were most popular didn’t find obvious differences. Their advice was that all had pros and cons but in the end, if you stick with them they work.
While online dating apps are the easiest way to meet, be careful about falling into the Paradox of Choice and/or adopting the Shopper’s mindset. Remember the pool is not endless and you must give people a chance by meeting in person. Keep your standards high but your expectations reasonable. It takes time to build a connection and to figure out whether someone is right for you.
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram and Facebook I post almost every day and it’s the best way to stay connected.
Is love holding you back?
Over the years I have seen that when it comes to dating and relationships there are four pillars for achieving the secure love that you’re working for.
Step one – How To Get Over Your Ex: If you’re still pining over the past, it’s going to be hard to grab onto the future. You might need to kick things into gear by finally moving on so that you can move forward. Get the course
Step two – Learn How to Date: Tired of the rinse and repeat strategies? It’s time you learned how to truly connect in the dating process, spot red flags, and move through the relationship stages in a healthy way. Get the Course
Step three – Understand Your Love Style: become secure in who you are by diving deeper into your individual love style (take my quiz to find out which love style is you). I have developed individual courses for Nervous Love Style, the Independent Love Style, the Confused Love Style and the Secure Love Style.